Top Ten List: Worst Films of 2011

10. Beastly - I guess this movie is supposed to be a young and hip remake of Beauty and the Beast. Instead it's a wooden, terribly written, terribly acted awful movie starring Vanessa Hudgens and Alex Pettyfer as two pretty people who can't act their way out of a paper bag and have no chemistry whatsoever. Plus, Neil Patrick Harris completely embarrasses himself by being a part of this mess. When Mary Kate Olsen is the best actor in your movie, you know you've got problems.

09. Insidious - Yes, it lives up to its name. This movie stops being good the minute the opening credits end. It's boring and trite and the last third of the movie is so overly ridiculous that it made me want to laugh out loud... and not in a good way.

08. Hesher - I love Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I love Natalie Portman. So this quirky indie drama couldn't go wrong, right? No way. I was so wrong. Hesher was a VERY BAD MOVIE starring very good actors about a rebellious asshole who befriends a mourning child and steals the grocery store clerk he's in love with. Unlikeable characters, less likeable script.

07. Your Highness - Or, What can go wrong when you have a movie directed by David Gordon Green (who directed two of the best movies I've ever seen) and starring Justin Theroux, James Franco, Natalie Portman, and Zooey Deschanel?? The answer, by the way, is everything.

06. The Dilemma - Watch Vince Vaughn make gay jokes while he struggles with the idea of trying to tell his best friend that his wife is cheating on him. Also, try to suspend disbelief and believe for even one second that a schlub like Kevin James can land a hottie like Winona Ryder.

05. Battle Los Angeles - I can't really say what this movie is about other than shaky cam alien invasion, or some shit. Mostly, it's just a really, really, really bad action movie filled with characters you don't care about doing stuff you don't care about.

04. Paul - Or, the biggest waste of time and the talents of a long list of people including, but not limited to, Bill Hader, Jason Bateman, Simon Pegg, Kristen Wiig, Jane Lynch, etc. etc. etc.

03. Super - Super, it is not. Instead, it's a disgusting, unfunny, unnecessary movie about a man that wants to be a super hero to save his wife from a drug king pin. Also, watch Ellen Page OVERACT so bad that I just had to capitalize the word.

02. Drive Angry - Nicolas Cage escapes from hell and takes a road trip in order to save his baby granddaughter from a cult that wants to sacrifice her to the devil. I'm not even remotely kidding about that synopsis.

01. One Day - I honestly don't know how this catastrophe of a movie was even made. One Day is one of my absolute favorite books. I don't know why they would make a movie version if they were planning on cutting out three quarters of the book. I don't know why they would cast Anne Hathaway who was absolutely terrible, but also, in her defense, totally wrong for the part. I just don't know why this movie was ever made in the first place.