Horrorfest: Unrest and Dark Ride

Unrest - I saw someone on imdb.com refer to this movie as "thought provoking." I proceeded to laugh my ass off for at least 5 minutes. Nothing in this poor excuse for a movie requires any thought whatsoever. It's a thoughtless, crappy movie that isn't scary, has a horrible script and even worse acting. The film follows a few doctor wannabes (all no-name actors who will hopefully never work again) who are taking part in a gross anatomy course where they have to disect dead bodies. Of course, the body belonging to one group is haunted or possessed or not really dead or not at rest... or whatever. I don't know and I really don't care. The movie is really just a god-awful mess. One minute they are struggling to find out who the corpse is. The next minute they somehow figure out who the corpse is. Then they have video clips of her in prison and being interrogated by police officers and, maybe, the actors audition tape for the movie? Where exactly are we to believe the students got these tapes? Netflix? Blockbuster? As a horror movie fan, I really am willing to put up with a lot of crap if the movie has any redeeming features whatsoever. The only reason I did not give this movie a big, fat F was because of the Tank Of Dead Guys (does that really exist in morgues?) and the Dead Guy Hook (which is awesome).
Grade: D-

Dark Ride - Bad script? Check. Bad acting? Check. Gratituous Nudity? Check. Shocking, twist ending that isn't so shocking or twisty? Check. Funhouse ripoff? Check. However, at the very, very, very, very, very least... this movie is entertaining. It's one of those movies that is so bad it's almost good. The movie starts out with twin girls in 1989 who enter a dark ride in Asbury Park and end up getting slaughtered by the creepy maniac inside the ride. Flash forward to present day and a group of kids head off to Spring Break and randomly decide to break into the abandoned amusement park ride and spend the night. Little do they know that two weeks earlier, crazy maniac guy busted out of the insane asylum where he was pleasantly spending his time and has currently taken up residence inside the dark ride as well. Cue the terror. But first, there's lots of drugs and sex and ghost stories. The movie stars that dude that used to be in 2gether, the little kid from The Big Green and the chick from The Sopranos (HA), none of whom can act their way out of a paper bag. But, like I said, at least the movie is utterly hilarious. Not that I think it's intention is to be hilarious, but it is. There are a few actually interesting scenes: the decapitation during oral sex (although the Thanksgiving trailer does it so, so much better). Ah, actually that's probably the only interesting scene but whatever. At the very least it's entertaining and one of the better Horrorfest movies.

Grade: C-

So, for those keeping score of Horrorfest:

The Hamiltons - B

The Gravedancers - C+

Dark Ride - C-

Penny Dreadful - D-

Unrest - D-

Wicked Little Things - F