The Bank Job, Doomsday, Miss Pettigrew, Horrorfest 2 begins...

The Bank Job - In a year where I've only given one movie above a D+, The Bank Job is a welcomed film. It's not fantastic, per se, but it is, at the very least, enjoyable. It stars Jason Statham and Saffron Burrows and tells the (allegedly) true story about a bunch of small time crooks who are duped into robbing one of the most famous banks in London. You see, some very important people want to get to the contents of a certain safe deposit box. The best way to do that, you ask? Get criminals to break in, of course! I have no idea how much of this movie is actually true. Most of it seems hard to believe. Still, the movie is a mostly well done heist film. When you get over the fact that you can't understand half of the things these people with heavy British accents say, then you can mostly enjoy the film. It's fun and funny. It has a lot of action and it's well thought out. I can do without the Hollywood ending. That is what I find most unbelievable about the entire story. It's not a great movie by any means but in this crappy year of movies, it's one of the better ones.
Grade: C+


Doomsday - Doomsday is from the director of The Descent, a movie that came out a few years ago that everyone loved and I hated. It stars Rhona Mitra, Bob Hoskins, the fantastic Malcolm McDowell, and the extras from the Dr. Dre / Tupac video for California Love. It's a little bit fun, sure. It's a little bit ridiculous (and I always mean that in the best sense of the word), sure. But it's also a lot cliched. It's sort of like those really bad movies like Date Movie and Superhero Movie and Epic Movie... except Doomsday plays it completely straight. I know a lot of people loved his previous film, The Descent, but I did not. So I didn't go in giving him the benefit of the doubt. It was an overblown, unneccesary film. It has a terrible script and uses solid actors (McDowell, Hoskins) very badly. So, at least come up with an original idea! Instead it rips off everything from Mad Max to Escape to New York and Resident Evil. Doomsday doesn't pay homage to these movies. Instead it is a mash up of much better movies clumped up into one huge mess. Also, if anyone could tell me what the hell was up with the Scottish castle? Yes, the movie also gets a little Gladiator at one point. If you like good acting, great scripts, character development, originality, thrills and suspense... then skip this movie.
Grade: D

Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day - Now, this movie isn't bad at all. It's cute (sometimes a little too cute, courtesy of Amy Adams... we'll get to that in a minute). It's a little bit fun and mostly well written and well done. Plus, it stars one of the greatest actresses working today and someone who has the possiblity to be one of the great actresses - Frances McDormand and Amy Adams, respectively. If anything, this movie is best described as a missed opportunity. It could have been more clever and funnier and just all together tighter. McDormand is fine in her role. Adams is cutesy... and I'm starting to have a problem with that. Amy Adams is cute. Yes, I know. She's nearly as cute as a kitten or a bunny or something. Still, when I watch her I'm beginning to get the feeling that I've seen it all before. In Junebug, she was cute. In Enchanted, she was cute. In this, she was cute. I mean, she's a great actress... but it's time to do something different! I want to see her play a serial killer or a child molester or a hooker or something (and not a cutesy Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman hooker either). I still have hope for her though. I will reserve my final judgments until after Doubt which comes out later this year. I believe she has range and can do darker, more serious things... I just need to see it. The movie is very hit or miss but it's great to see McDormand on screen again. She hasn't really had a juicy role since Fargo. Since then she's just been playing mothers and sisters and friends. I know she's a character actress but so is Johnny Depp and he's a huge star so why can't McDormand be as well? In the end, the movie is decent and at times enjoyable. However, it is missing one very important element - heart. Everyone seems to be going through the motions and nothing ever really connects with the audience. It's a shame because this movie could have been something much more and much better.
Grade: C-

Horrorfest 2
Nightmare Man - Ugh. If this is any indication of how Horrorfest 2.0 is going to go then I think I'll change my mind about watching all 8 films (again). Why subject myself to such potential misery? Last years crop of films were mediocre at best and downright awful at worst. But, I did find a solid little gem called The Hamiltons and I'm hoping to do that again this year. I mean, they can't all be awful, right? Hopefully not, but Nightmare Man is, ahem, a nightmare. It's a story everyone has heard a million, trillion times before. Crazy bad actress wants to have a baby so she orders a fertility mask which ends up possibly being a demon who haunts her dreams and potentially lives inside her. Or... is she crazy? It's hard to tell because she's such a lousy actress. Anyway, en route to a mental institution where her husband is taking her, the car runs out of gas. Husband walks back to gas station. Wife / bad actress / annoying bitch gets chased through the woods by Nightmare Man and ends up coming upon a cabin in the middle of nowhere. Inside are two couples playing Truth or Dare (do people who are not 12 actually play this game?) and faking orgasms and stripping and being lesbians (of course!). Blah blah blah. Slasher cliches ensue. If Mystery Science Theater was still on the air, this would be one of their favorite films to tear apart. There is almost nothing redeeming here. There is one kid (I don't know any of their names and I don't care to learn them) who isn't a terrible actor... but he dies pretty quickly. I don't know which is worse - the script or the acting. There are bad continuity errors (and I don't even usually notice this stuff but it's sooooo bad and obvious here), the make up is cheesy and the movie is the exact opposite of scary. I'm just hoping all of the Horrorfest 2.0 movies aren't this bad.
Grade: F