July 2015

Fifty Shades of Grey
Stars - Dakota Johnson, Jamie Dornan
Plot - A virginal college girl falls for a billionaire businessman who is a little on the kinky side.
Thoughts - Anyone who knows me, knows that I was not a fan of the poorly written book. It's not even the fact that the writer seems to hate women, it's just that a fifth grader has a better grasp of the English language. I feel like director Sam Taylor-Johnson really wanted to make a better movie, but the source material just wouldn't allow for that to happen. Dakota Johnson is a star waiting to happen, but mostly this was just a bad, unsexy movie and Dornan has the personality of a rock.
Grade - D-

The Loft
Stars - James Marsden, Karl Urban, Wentworth Miller
Plot - A group of friends share a loft where they can take their mistresses, but when a woman turns up dead, they all suspect each other.
Thoughts - I mean, interesting idea. This movie definitely had potential, and despite being shot like some cheesy Telemundo soap opera, it actually kept me interested. Still, there were absolutely no likable characters and it was hard to care about the outcome with no one to root for.
Grade - C-

The DUFF
Stars - Mae Whitman
Plot - A high school girl finds out she is the Designated Ugly Fat Friend and decides to change her life.
Thoughts - Sure, this is a cliche filled high school comedy that pales in comparison to much better, classic teen movies. But I've always felt like the ugly fat friend, and I still feel like an outcast, so this movie hit a little close to home for me. Maybe I related to it a bit too much and maybe I'm being too kind, but I would recommend it.
Grade - B-

Southpaw
Stars - Jake Gyllenhaal, Rachel McAdams
Plot - A boxer struggles to get his life together after a tragedy puts him in a self destructive tailspin.
Thoughts - Relatively speaking, this is no Raging Bull or Rocky, or even The Fighter. But I do love a good boxing movie, and I think Gyllenhaal is our best young actor, someone who constantly challenges himself and betters himself. He is so exciting to watch.  Even when the script feels overly sentimental or overly cheesy, his raw and devastating performance pulls everything together.
Grade - B

Dark Places
Stars - Charlize Theron, Nicholas Hoult, Corey Stoll
Plot - The lone survivor of a horrendous murder rethinks the testimony she gave which put her brother in prison for killing their entire family.
Thoughts - Mostly this movie just made me want to read the really great, perfectly plotted book by Gillian Flynn again. It's not that the movie is bad, per se, it just feels long and sluggish and boring sometimes. The book was a non stop page turner, but this adaptation is just okay. Come for Corey Stoll, though, who steals the show.
Grade - C

Trainwreck
Stars - Amy Schumer, Bill Hader, Tilda Swinton
Plot - A hot mess journalist who likes a good one night stand falls for a nerdy and sweet doctor, even though she is a mess and incapable of loving or being loved and she is uncomfortable with intimacy and the idea that her sister is having babies A.K.A. the story of my life.
Thoughts - I was super excited for this movie because I RELATE, man, but I was slightly disappointed. I mean, I laughed, I cried, I fell even harder for Schumer. Still, it just didn't totally get there for me. I think all Judd Apatow movies are about 30 minutes too long and a little editing would have gone a long way. Still, the movie is funny and feminist and breaks rom-com conventions. It's probably the type of movie that will grow on me (like another Apatow movie, Knocked Up, which I despised the first time I saw it). Also, a nearly unrecognizable Tilda Swinton steals the whole movie. (Like, I'm seriously not even fully convinced that it was really her.)
Grade - B-

Oscar Nominations, Cloverfield, 27 Dresses

Oscar Nominations were announced today -

Best Picture
Atonement
Juno
Michael Clayton
No Country For Old Men
There Will Be Blood
Thoughts - While I am glad that Atonement did not get snubbed, I am fuming mad about all the Into the Wild snubs!

Best Director
Paul Thomas Anderson - There Will Be Blood
Joel and Ethan Coen - No Country For Old Men
Tony Gilroy - Michael Clayton
Jason Reitman - Juno
Julian Schnabel - The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Thoughts - People actually saw Into the Wild and it's brilliance, yes? Because these people obviously didn't actually watch Juno. I mean, the direction is nothing to write home about. Sean Penn's direction on the other hand...

Best Actor
George Clooney - Michael Clayton
Daniel Day-Lewis - There Will Be Blood
Johnny Depp - Sweeney Todd
Tommy Lee Jones - In the Valley of Elah
Viggo Mortensen - Eastern Promises
Thoughts - No Emile! Big surprise. However, I can't be that upset because Tommy Lee Jones was nominated instead and I loved his performance in that film!

Best Actress
Cate Blanchett - Elizabeth the Golden Age
Julie Christie - Away From Her
Marion Cotillard - La Vie En Rose
Laura Linney - The Savages
Ellen Page - Juno
Thoughts - Finally! A category I am happy about. No Angelina Jolie! Hooray!

Best Supporting Actor
Casey Affleck - The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Javier Bardem - No Country For Old Men
Phillip Seymour Hoffman - Charlie Wilson's War
Hal Holbrook - Into the Wild
Tom Wilkinson - Michael Clayton
Thoughts - I can't complain too much here.

Best Supporting Actress
Cate Blanchett - I'm Not There
Ruby Dee - American Gangster
Saoirse Ronan - Atonement
Amy Ryan - Gone Baby Gone
Tilda Swinton - Michael Clayton
Thoughts - Can't really complain much here either. Although I am a little upset that Kelly MacDonald didn't get any love but whatever. That pales in comparison to how pissed I am about the whole Into the Wild snubbing!


Cloverfield - For the most part, Cloverfield is a surprinsgly good little movie. I was actually surprised by how much I enjoyed it. I know a lot of people hated it, but I absolutely loved how it was filmed. The shaky camera lends to the realism. I didn't find it annoying in the least. It actually really feels like you are watching someone's home movie that was found after the fact. If it was all steady camera shots, then it just wouldn't be as effective. I thought the basic premise was pretty solid, although I have a few problems with the way things panned out ultimately. 1) While you did develop feelings for most of the characters, I didn't really care at all about the girl these people risked their lives for. There needed to be a little more development there. I needed to somehow see that this Rob fellow actually cared about her. I really don't think the movie delivered that. 2) It was your typical 'Stupid or Seemingly Smart People Doing Things that Are Ultimately Stupid.' I can let that slide, however, because, really, movies like this aren't really made about smart people. There would be no movie then. Smart people would get the hell out of dodge. They wouldn't risk their lives for some slutty girl (that's how I viewed her because, like I said, the movie gave me no reason to care about her at all). 3) The monster. My main problem with monster movies is always, always, always the monster. When we exited the theater, the people I went with said, and I quote, "Gee whiz! I'm so glad they actually showed the monster." I disagree. Actually, I couldn't disagree more. Bits and pieces of the monster would have been find but as soon as I see a monster, it completely takes me out of the moment. The film did a really great job of making everything feel as real as possible. But the whole monster thing just does nothing for me. As soon as I see a great, big, ole monster, anything immediately goes from being intense and realistic to just plain silly. (I had the same problem with The Mist a few months ago). No matter how well the CGI is done, monsters will always seem silly to me. There's something to be said for letting things to the imagination. If we didn't see the monster, we could have all created something in our minds that would have been more terrifying than anything J.J. Abrams and his pals could cook up. However, I don't want anyone to think I didn't like the movie because I mostly did. In fact, I recommend it. You should definitely check it out. And keep your eyes peeled for that last scene and look to the right of the screen (see if you can see something falling into the ocean). It is J.J. Abrams after all. Conspiracy theories must spread like wild fire!
Grade: B-

27 Dresses - And then there's this. First, let's talk about the good points. No movie ever suffered from having Judy Greer involved. In fact, it's really time for her to move on from the 'best friend / bitchy rival' thing she's been doing for, well, ever. Honestly, she should be getting every role that goes to Leslie Mann. If I ever write a script, I will make sure that it has roles for Judy Greer and Allison Janney! Also, James Marsden is really just crazy attractive. He's charming and, well, really sexy. What with those blue eyes, gorgeous smile and chiseled cheek bones. Well, I'll see anything that involves James Marsden. Another good point was that the usually annoying beyond all belief Katherine Heigl actually wasn't as bad as I imagined. I didn't completely hate her in this movie (although I still pretty much did). And that's where all the goodness stops. The movie is paint by numbers romantic comedy. You can see where it's going based soley on the previews. It's marginally funny and marginally interesting. Even the big 'Let's dance on a bar and sing Bennie and the Jets' scene (which is cute and funny, thanks to Marsden mostly) can't save this stinker. Every tired romantic comedy cliche is there and in full force. Also, there is a major lack of chemistry between Marsden and Heigl. Just because they are both pretty doesn't mean they are going to have chemistry (see also: The Nanny Diaries starring Scarlett Jo and Chris Evans). There are many scenes that should be edited down to be tighter and funnier. Instead they just drag on and on and become way too talky. Maybe I'm just a little too much of a modern woman or maybe I just completely missed the point but what I took away from the movie was this message - No matter how beautiful, intelligent or interesting you are, you are only really complete as a woman when you find a man who can take care of you and that makes you happy. As a feminist woman, I frankly find that offensive. (Believe me, I know this isn't the first romantic comedy to spout that message but it's the first in a long time where it comes across so heavy-handedly).
Grade: D+

Short reviews of other movies I saw recently...

The Bucket List - Basically, it's cliched and predictable. However, whatever part of this movie that works only does so because of the likeability and charm of Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. It can be argued that Jack is becoming like Diane Keaton and only playing versions of himself at this point. However, when anyone talks shit about Jack, I like to evoke the 'Chinatown Clause' which pretty much states he was so magnificent in that movie (along with tons of others) that we are never allowed to say a bad word about him ever. I love you Jack!
Grade: C+

Death Sentence - Ah, Kevin Bacon. I love you, I really do, but homeboy needs to start picking some better films that really showcase his talent and not just his ability to kick major ass. The director behind Saw directs this near-disaster. I don't know why he thought shooting in stairwells and parking garages was a good idea. It makes everything feel a little claustrophobic to be honest. Bonus points for giving the great and underrated Matt O'Leary something to do!
Grade: D+

Hairspray, Premonition (DVD)

Hairspray - Hairspray is the kind of movie that immediately puts a smile on your face. It's a charming, well done musical. Is it as glossy as last years big musical, Dreamgirls? No. Dreamgirls surely looked better but as far as story, characters, and substance, Hairspray is far superior. The story follows chubby teenager Tracy Turnblad (Nikki Blonsky) in 1960's Baltimore. She and her best friend Penny Pingleton (an adorable Amanda Bynes) are obsessed with the dance program The Corny Collins Show hosted by James Marsden. Tracy also has a major crush on one of the stars of the show - Link Larkin (Zac Efron). Despite her mother's (John Travolta!) discouragement, Tracy auditions for the show and Corny picks her eventhough the station manager Velma (a delightful, evil, wonderful Michelle Pfeiffer) objects. Lots of singing and dancing ensues. Queen Latifah, Brittany Snow, Allison Janney, Elijah Kelley, and Christopher Walken round out the stellar cast. Also, look for cameos from some of the gang from the original Hairspray movie: Jerry Stiller, Ricki Lake and original director John Waters. Eventhough Hairspray may seem dated (takes place in the early 60's, remake of a movie from the late 80's), its very much like Grease in the sense that it's timeless. The songs are great (my personal favorite is 'Ladie's Choice' by Efron... and I can see why he elicits screams from young girls - he's dreamy!). The cast is nothing short of amazing. Pfeiffer, making a return to the screen after way too long, is easily the stand-out. She's just having so much fun being so, so very bad. Bynes would get my best runner up award as far as performances go. She's adorable and hilarious. Blonsky is a wonderfully capable newcomer. Walked is mostly being Walken (and there is definitely nothing wrong with that) and Travolta is having the time of his life - especially during hs homage to Tina Turner near the end. The story drags a bit and the cinematography could have been stronger but all in all, Hairspray is one fun movie!

Grade: B

Premonition - What Sandra Bullock lacks in talent (let's face it - she's no Meryl), she makes up for in likeability. I find it very difficult to not like her when she's in a film. She's easy to cheer for and you really want to like the swill she turns up in most of the time. I actually really liked her last attempt at traversing space and time in film - The Lake House - but that made up for all the plot holes with chemistry to spare from Bullock and Keanu Reeves. There is zero chemistry between Bullock and her Premonition love interest Julian McMahan. I like him but he's going through the motions here. McMahon plays Bullock's husband who dies one day and is alive the next. It goes back and forth and things happen that Bullock can't explain. People talk to her like they've met before but she doesn't know who they are. Here daughter has scars all over her face and doesn't know why. There are random dead birds and strange phone messages. So, in short, Premonition is sort of a mess - bad supporting actors giving wooden performances, a script that isn't nearly as clever as it thinks it is, plot holes galore. The only thing it really has going for it is Bullock's likeability factor. You want to root for her. Unfortunately, likeability only gets you so far and Bullock just can't save this movie.

Grade: D+