21, Leatherheads, The Ruins, Horrorfest

21 - The glitz! The glamour! The pretty, young things! It must be a gambling flick set in Las Vegas! 21 tells the semi-true story of a bunch of MIT geniuses who decide to use their math abilities for evil and not good - they take up counting cards and spend their weekends in hot and steamy Vegas instead of cold and snowy Boston and take the casinos for lots and lots of money. Because, you know, it's not enough that these kids be smarter than everyone else - they also have to be richer than everyone else and (for the movie's sake, at least) hotter than everyone else. The young leads of the film are Jim Sturgess and Kate Bosworth - and that's a problem. Sure, they are both young and pretty and they look great making doe eyes at each other. However, neither are exceptionally great actors. I mean, Sturgess is charming and good-looking but I think he only has two expressions - wide eyed innocence and angry greed. Bosworth knows she's pretty and knows she'll continue to get acting jobs so it seems she's content with doing the minimum required of her. So, the two leads leave all the heavy lifting to the big names in the cast - Kevin Spacey and Laurence Fishburn. They are both game for the challenge. Fishburn plays the same character he's been playing for at least the last ten years. Not that there is anything wrong with that. There's no one else I would want as my tough talking, moral yet sneaky, kick your ass if you cross me black man. Then there's Spacey. He's returned to form here. It's disappointing that he won the Best Actor Oscar for American Beauty which then put him in this habit of playing moral leading men. Kevin Spacey was never and will never be a leading man. He's much too interesting and too talented. He's at his best when he's playing different degrees of evil. His character here, the professor who starts the whole card counting club, isn't evil, per se. But he is a snarky sort of cynical sort of smartass. And there is absolutely no one that does snarky, cynical or smartass quite like Spacey. And so, Spacey is an absolute joy to watch. Director Robert Luketic wants to be Martin Scorsese while filming Casino but he's not. Instead he makes a shallow, glitzy, shiny, fun movie. And sometimes it's more than enough to be shallow and fun. This isn't a movie that wants to change your life. If you ignore the fact that it sometimes plays off as a vacation commercial for Las Vegas (has Las Vegas looked this much fun lately?!) and that the plot holes are the size of the Grand Canyon at times, then you'll surely enjoy the film.
Grade: C+


Leatherheads - File this one under 'wasted opportunity.' Director and star George Clooney does a decent job of creating a certain kind of atmosphere - jazz and football circa the 1920s. But good atmosphere can only get you so far. The story surrounds the beginning of professional football as we know it in 1925. Clooney stars as Dodge Connelly, the player / manager / public relations spinner of the Duluth Bulldogs, a rag tag group of guys who have never played a clean game in their life. But damn it if they aren't fun! After funding runs out on their league, Dodge gets the brilliant idea to recruit Princeton star and supposed war hero The Bullet (John Krasinski). At the time, recruiting college players was unheard of and Dodge's decisions will forever change the face of football. Enter Renee Zellweger to play Lexie Littleton a sassy little journalist who livens things up a bit. Now the major problem. The movie is boring as hell! For all that atmosphere, all that charm, all the zingy one liners and nice costumes - it never really goes anywhere. There is something that just doesn't click. The script is decent enough. The acting is solid enough. The directing is solid enough. It just doesn't work. I love slapstick comedy as a genre but something about everything coming together just doesn't click. Clooney and Zellweger fancy themselves Grant and Hepburn from Bringing Up Baby. They are not. If I had to pick a best performance, however, I'd go with Zellweger. She's been pretty hit or miss for me lately but this movie actually reminded me why I, at one time, loved her so. The role is really perfect for her. There hasn't been a more perfect role for her since Bridget Jones. She's got that face and that attitude and it looks like she really did belong in the 1920s. Clooney and Krasinski are both charming, funny guys. This movie should have been something pretty great. Instead, it just plays as a boring disappointment.
Grade: D+

The Ruins - Here's the thing: The Ruins isn't a bad movie by any means. As far as modern day horror movies goes, it's one of the better ones. While it's not for everyone and it's not nearly as good as the masterpieces it pays homage to, those who appreciate the horror genre will probably find the movie to be enjoyable at the very least. It's a little disturbing and graphic (which doesn't bother me but will surely upset some people... like the woman sitting a few rows behind me who apparently never saw a horror movie in her entire life) and a little cliched. The film moves along at a fast pace. It's got a short running time and a bunch of young actors who are hot AND can act (imagine that!). The thing I think I liked most about it is that the characters actually do things that a normal person would probably do in the given situation. (And this is a rarity in horror films!). There are a few really intense and solid scenes. Of course, there are a few not so great scenes as well. The acting is all believable (Jena Malone and Jonathan Tucker are the stars but Laura Ramsey steals the show). I'm not exactly sure that there is a great plot in there and I'm not exactly sure I loved everything about what they found when they got to the ruins but I didn't hate it enough to not recommend this film. It's not a great movie but it's definitely fun for people who are sick of watered down, cheap, lousy horror movies.
Grade: C
[For the record: this would have gotten a C+ but I absolutely hated the ending... especially after finding out what the ending of the book is... they really, really, really should have thought a little longer about keeping the ending the same.]

Mulberry Street - I know I've used the phrase "Worst Movie Ever Made" more than once on this blog but this time I'm serious. I mean, it's about Rat People, for Christ's sake. So, seriously, stay far away from this lousy, terrible, awful movie.
Grade: F

The Other Boleyn Girl, Southland Tales, Drillbit Taylor

The Other Boleyn Girl - Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson are probably two of the most talented young working actresses. Sure, they are hit or miss. Scarlett was fantastic in Lost in Translation, but for every Woody Allen movie there's something like The Island that balances it out. Natalie gave her absolute best performance in Closer but for every Goya's Ghost there is a Star Wars prequel to discuss. Still, they both have potential. In The Other Boleyn Girl, they play roles you think maybe should have been reversed. In real life, anyway, it seems Natalie is the meeker of the two while Scarlett is a little more extroverted. In the film, Scarlett plays soft-spoken, kind-hearted Mary Boleyn and Natalie plays manipulative Anne Boleyn. One performance works completely, the other not so much. Scarlett is all over the place in her portrayal. One moment she's great but the next her accent seems fake, her expressions are painful, etc. Meanwhile, Natalie is just great. She starts out the film as a flirtatious young troublemaker. At one point, her character is sent to exile in France. When she returns, she's a total bad ass. That's when the film really comes to life, as well. The beginning of the film is boring and long but the second half is much more enjoyable. Kristin Scott Thomas also dazzles as a sort of feminist before her time, playing the mother of the children. Eric Bana plays the mecurial Henry the VIII, although I'd rather Jonathan Rhys Myers anyday. Jim Sturgess rounds out a pretty solid cast as the brother of Anne and Mary (and try not to cry for his pretty, little head). The film is very soap opera-ish but that's not necessarily a bad thing. The editing and directing decisions aren't exactly good enough. The ending sort of assumes that everyone watching the movie is a moron (probably because most of them are). Still, the movie is not entirely bad. In fact, it's mostly interesting and entertaining. I just wish it would have gotten an R-rating so it could have been a little racier. What's the point of all the bed hopping if it's PG-13?
Grade: C+


Southland Tales - When the movie ended, my friend asked, "Did you like it?" I wasn't sure what to say at the time. Southland Tales, from Richard Kelley, the director of Donnie Darko, is by far the strangest movie I have ever seen that wasn't directed by David Lynch. However, the more I think about it (and it does stick with you whether you like it or not), the more I think I absolutely loved it (think is the operative word). What is Southland Tales about, you ask? Well, I kind of have no idea. The easiest way to explain is to say it's about the end of the world. At one point in the film, about half way through, there is a sort of musical intermission where Justin Timberlake lip synchs to a song by The Killers. Sarah Michelle Gellar plays a porn star who wants to be a pop star who sings a song called "Teen Horniness is Not a Crime." There is a scene of two SUV's having sex. Seann William Scott plays twins - one's a racist cop, the other has no memory (I think). The Rock plays an action star named Boxer who is married to the daughter of a Republican senator (Mandy Moore) but sleeping with Sarah Michelle Gellar's Kristy Now (who's tag line is, "If you want to f**k me, f**k me now."). At one point, the Rock also says the following line, "I'm a pimp. And pimps don't commit suicide." Like I said, it's a strange, strange movie. Still, it was over two hours long and it didn't feel like it. It kept my interest and it was, at the very least, unique. After much thought, I think it was actually one of my favorite movies of last year. So, at first, I had no idea what grade to give it. Now I think I've made my decision and most people won't agree with it but I don't care. This is definitely not a movie for everyone.
Grade: A

Drillbit Taylor - I can't think of any reason why Owen Wilson would want to make this movie. But I am glad that he did because without his natural charm and likeability, this movie would have been just crap. I mean, it has it's moments. Unfortunately, there aren't many of them. The three kids have a sort of natural chemistry that is nice and there are, maybe, two scenes which are actually laugh out loud funny. Other than that it's amusing at best and boring at worst. I think the Judd Apatow machine may finally be falling apart. Although, this is minor Apatow - watered down, rated PG-13, no Jonah Hill. It's pre-Superbad, but not nearly as funny. There's really not much to say about the movie. It's nothing special and not very funny. Skip it!
Grade: D+