Catching up!

I know I have been neglecting this blog but no more! Here are some mini reviews to catch up on all the movies I've seen but didn't review. As of now, I will update regularly with reviews and more (think top ten lists, actor profiles, useless fun trivia, etc.). But first, mini reviews (from best to worst):

The Ghost Writer - First off, this film is completely and utterly predictable. I knew who the killer was almost instantly. Still, it's a well done, damn good thriller. Directed by the notorious Roman Polanski and starring Ewan McGregor, Pierce Brosnon and Olivia Williams, The Ghost Writer is a political thriller with a whole lot of conspiracy theory thrown in. When the ghost writer of an ex-prime minister mysteriously ends up dead due to an "accident", McGregor reluctantly takes over his job and starts to unravel a whole lot of secrets. He also finds out that the death wasn't so much an accident as it was murder. The closer he gets to finding out the truth, the more someone wants to murder him as well. However predictable the story is, the acting and directing are so damn good that it hardly matters. Plus, that ending is perfect. (B)

Piranha 3D - Seriously, the most fun I have had at a movie theater in as long as I can remember!! Remember when 3D first came out and the previews for My Bloody Valentine 3D started showing and I thought to myself, "A 3D horror movie? That's the third greatest idea of all time (after the snuggie and the microwave, obviously)." Then I saw My Bloody Valentine 3D and it was a bloody awful mess. Well, Piranha 3D does every single thing right! It's so trashy and so over the top and so damn fun! Just try to not have a good time at this movie. I'm not even going to tell you plot. Okay, how about piranha's go crazy during Spring Break at an idyllic lake. That's all you need to know besides the fact that the cast is actually all kinds of impressive: Elisabeth Shue as chief of police, Ving Rhames as her badass deputy, Adam Scott as a scientist, Steven R. McQueen as Shue's impressionable son, Jerry O'Connell as a sleazy porn entrepeneur. Then there are the super fun cameos from Richard Dreyfuss and Christopher Lloyd. Plus, the movie was directed by Alexandre Aja who did High Tension and the super great remake of The Hills Have Eyes. I really want to give this a higher grade but I'm afraid all my credibility will be stripped away. (B)

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World - In a summer of typical, awful movies, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World was a ray of sunshine, completely original and completely creative. From Shaun of the Dead / Hot Fuzz director Edgar Wright, this adaptation of a highly revered comic book follows Scott Pilgrim (Michael Cera) and his quest to defeat the seven evil exes of his dream girl, Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead). The supporting cast is perfection: Allison Pill, Johnny Simmmons, Mark Webber, Anna Kendrick, Jason Schwartzman, Chris Evans, Brandon Routh. Kieran Culkin as Scott's sarcastic gay roommate Wallace steals every single solitary scene he is in. (Also, I'm a dork and I totally did pick out the Tennessee Thomas cameo!). It all becomes a bit plotting. The fight scenes are all well done and different but there are SIX of them! Then there's that comic book / video game feel the game has which is super original and creative but it does get a little overwhelming at times. I'm not sure I was in love with all aspects of the ending but overall, I would recommend this super fun, super well done movie to anyone. (B)

The Girl Who Played with Fire - The second installment of the Millenium trilogy, this Swedish film follows the best female character in recent history, Lisbeth Salander (Noomi Rapace) as she is framed for the murder of two journalists. She and Mikael Blomquist, her ex-lover / journalist friend (Michael Nyqvist) become involved in a trafficking story that involves a lot of very high powered men. While not nearly as engaging as The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, the second installment is still a damn good movie. It does seem a little more rushed than the first, introducing characters on a whim and skipping past seemingly important story lines. Still, Noomi Rapace is a revelation. She is amazing as Lisbeth Salander, perfectly embodying the hacker punk heroine. Rooney Mara is going to have a hell of a lot to live up to. (B)

Winter's Bone - First off, Jennifer Lawrence is amaazing in the lead role. She is a real find. John Hawkes is also damn good in his supporting role as her uncle but then he has been a stellar supporting character actor for years now. The movie is basically about a 17 year old (Lawrence) whose dad has been in and out of jail. Her mom is mentally ill so she must raise her two younger siblings all by herself in some barren wasteland somewhere in the midewest. She finds out her dad has skipped bail and put their house up for collateral so she must find her dad within a week or the house will be taken from them. So, that's what she does. And it's all very plotting and boring. She just goes from one crazy relative to the next trying to find her dad. You're not sure if her relatives want to kill her or hug her and sometimes they do both in a matter of minutes. The performances are the only real saving factor here. (C+)

Machete - Look, I'm not going to tell you that Machete is some amazing, future Oscar winner or anything. It is very typically Robert Rodriguez. If you like his other films, then you will probably like this one. It is a lot of fun but there's nothing new here. He has a knack for writing interesting, far out characters (think Cherry in Planet Terror). Here we've got Machete (Danny Trejo), She (Michelle Rodriguez) and Lindsay Lohan who at one point wears a nun's habit while killing a bunch of bad guys. There's guns and fights and sex and blood. But it's a lot of fun. And, I mean, look, I was just there for Jeff Fahey. Also, dear Hollywood, next summer I would like a Machete vs. Piranha movie. You're welcome. (C)

Eat Pray Love - I have the same exact problem with the movie as I did with the book (although it didn't seem to annoy me quite as much with the book which I actually liked very much) - the main character, Elizabeth Gilbert, who also wrote the book, is a whiny little bitch! Watch as she whines about losing her husband while she's sleeping with a hotter version of him (Billy Crudup / James Franco, respectively). Watch as she whines about how lonely she is as she trapses around Italy, India and Bali. Watch as she talks about all the "poor little rich white girl" problems she has while she's interacting with people who have actual problems!! It seems like it's the Elizabeth Gilbert world with everything revolving around her. We just live in her world. It's all just a bit much. I didn't like Liz when I was reading the book although I did enjoy the travel aspect of the book. Julia Roberts, who has an immense likeability factor, can't even make me like this woman. Plus, this movie went on and on and on and on. It may have been two and a half hours long but it felt like five hours. (D)

The Hills Have Eyes II

Last year's The Hills Have Eyes remake accomplished what very few remakes manage to do : it took the best parts of the original and then made everything else even better, scarier and gorier and bloodier. I credit most of this to director Alexandre Aja who is a brilliant man working within the horror genre (netflix his High Tension right now!). Aja's remake of Wes Craven's 1977 film was the best horror remake ever. But, a sequel to a remake? Sure, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Prequel wasn't so bad but I wasn't excited about this idea. Still, I'll check it out because the only thing better than a good horror movie is a bad one so I can complain about how they don't make them like they used to. I can tell you this however - this film is much better than the 1986 sequel to the original (now that was a bad, bad movie). This film was written by Wes Craven and his son and, luckily, doesn't follow the story of the original sequel at all.
This sequel follows a group of National Guard trainees. The main people to watch are Napoleon (Michael McMillian), Amber (Jessica Stroup), Missy (Danielle Alonso) and Delmar (Lee Thompson Young), who may just be the smartest person in a modern horror film. On their last day of training, they are sent to stop by a base camp of scientists doing research in the New Mexico desert to drop off equipment and when they get there, they find it empty. After hearing cries of help on a radio and seeing a flashing signal coming from the hills, they decide to climb up there, assuming it is a scientist in need of help. This is how it all begins.
The same creepy music remains but gone are the fascinating opening credits the remake employed (however, this movie opens up with the most disgusting birthing scene you could ever imagine). That movie had me from the beginning... this movie takes a little longer to grow on you. In the beginning, I thought for sure I was going to hate this movie so much but it turns out to be not so bad. It is, at the very least, entertaining. The scenes in the latter part of the film in the mine tunnels were well done and became a perfect creepy setting for the battles to play out. The acting was good enough. None of the cast are stars but their performances were average and they played their characters believably enough. The thing that lacks most is how severly underdeveloped the characters are. This is something I loved so, so much about the 2006 remake. That was a slow burner that took a while to get to the action, but wasn't boring because you spent the first thirty mintues getting to know the characters and getting to care about their fate. You don't really care about any of these people.
The bloodshed and gore are all there... it's a huge part of the movie (as it should be) and it doesn't let up. There are severed limbs, stabbings, shootings, impalements, and heads being smashed into mush galore. If you are expecting a blood-soaked movie, you're going to get one. It may even go a step further on the violence and the gore than did the remake although that was gory enough. One major, major problems I had with this movie was the cannibals. The cannibals in the 2006 remake were much nastier and inhuman than those in the Craven film and they were creepy and scary. In this movie, the cannibals are so disgusting and so over the top that they border on campy. They shouldn't look like normal people, but they just over do it a little bit with the make-up effects in this film. They should have stuck with the same make-up they used in the remake, but I assume they were just trying to go nastier for the shock value. Too bad it didn't work. Another thing that just didn't work was the ending. I won't ruin anything for you when I say it ends much like the remake although here it is much too abrupt and fast. It leaves it wide open for another sequel (which I think they should pass on... people need to know when to quit).
Overall, The Hills Have Eyes II is pretty decent, although it's much more violent than scary. I prefer Craven's original and definitely Aja's remake to this any day, but it's worth seeing if you enjoy those. It's a bit bland at times and could use some improvements (and I think Aja could have done wonders with this) but it wasn't a bad way for a horror fan to spend an hour and a half.
Grade: C+