Halfway Point of 2014

At the mid-point of 2014, I must say that, overall, I am pretty disappointed with the movies released this year. I have only seen a few things that I thought were good, and nothing that has really wowed me. Usually around this time of year, I release a Best of the Year so far sort of list, the actors and movies that deserve recognition, but probably won't make it to my end of the year list. So, here it is, but keep in mind that this year is sort of below par, at least so far.

Best Actor
01. James McAvoy in X-Men: Days of Future Past
02. Jason Bateman in Bad Words
03. Kevin Costner in Draft Day
04. Oscar Isaac in In Secret
05. Tom Cruise in Edge of Tomorrow

Best Actress
01. Emily Blunt in Edge of Tomorrow
02. Rose Byrne in Neighbors
03. Kristen Bell in Veronica Mars
04. Elizabeth Olsen in In Secret
05. Shailene Woodley in Divergent

Best Supporting Actor
01. Bryan Cranston in Godzilla
02. Nat Wolff in The Fault in Our Stars
03. Dane DeHaan in The Amazing Spider-man 2
04. Michael Fassbender in X-Men: Days of Future Past
05. Jai Courtney in Divergent

Best Supporting Actress
01. Jessica Lange in In Secret
02. Scarlett Johansson in Captain America: The Winter Soldier
03. Emma Stone in The Amazing Spider-man 2

Best Film
01. Captain America: The Winter Soldier
02. Edge of Tomorrow
03. Godzilla
04. Bad Words
05. 22 Jump Street

Mini Reviews

I have been slacking lately, and I promise to pick up the pace for all my loyal readers (haha). Anyway, I've seen a few movies this year that I haven't had time to write about so I figured I would write a little something about them before moving on to the SUMMER BLOCKBUSTERS (read: Godzilla, which is literally the only thing I care about right now).

Endless Love
Stars: Alex Pettyfer, Gabriella Wilde
Plot: A sheltered rich girl falls for a charismatic bad boy and they fall crazy in love with each other. Dance parties, breaking and entering, and burning down houses ensues.
Thoughts: I mean, the movie was decent. There is nothing special about it, but I also seriously didn't mind starring at Alex Pettyfer (he so pretty) for an hour and a half. Plus, he and Wilde had a really sweet chemistry. And she is just about the prettiest girl I've ever seen. And it just occurred to me that the only redeeming qualities this movie had are its pretty stars.
Grade: C-

Bad Words
Stars: Jason Bateman
Plot: A grown man finds a loophole and decides to enter a child's spelling bee. Bateman's character is pretty much the most terrible person that ever walked the face of the Earth as he bad mouths and tortures kids, knocking them out of the tournament one by one.
Thoughts: Hilarious is a good word for it. Bateman, who also directed, knocks it out of the park with this very funny, very dirty, very raw movie. My only concern with it was that it felt really, really long and it was only 90 minutes. FYI: That's a sign of a bad editor. If a movie is short and feels long, you've got a bad editor on your hands. Inversely, if a movie is long and feels short, give that editor an Oscar!
Grade: B

Draft Day
Stars: Kevin Costner, Jennifer Garner, Chadwick Boseman
Plot: A day in the life of the General Manager of the Cleveland Browns as he struggles to make big decision regarding the NFL draft. Unfortunately, no cameos from Johnny Manziel.
Thoughts: I liked this movie, especially the last third of it which is unrealistic but still hugely exciting (and, just so you know, the real draft is not even close to being that exciting). The movie is mostly held together by the endless charms of Kevin Costner. But the strange editing (split scenes, characters walking through said split screens and crossing into a different space) is really off-putting and distracting. Chadwick Boseman absolutely kills it as a hopeful Brown.
Grade: C

Neighbors
Stars: Rose Byrne, Zac Efron, Seth Rogen, Dave Franco
Plot: A Frat moves next door to a pair of new parents who are struggling to grow up and still be cool.
Thoughts: This movie is super funny, if not a little heavy handed. Neighbors sort of assumes that the audience is really stupid, spelling things out for you, like we can't just pick up on the hints that Byrne and Rogen are struggling with not being young or hip anymore, or that Efron is the golden boy who is terrified of the future. They have to hit you over the head with these things, saying them out loud. Still, Neighbors is definitely a good time. Byrne steals the show, and it's really nice to see a comedy that lets the woman actually be funny and not uptight or something. Also, Zac Efron's abs are a thing of beauty and perfection and I almost never want to see another man besides him shirtless ever again. See it for his abs alone!
Grade: B

Fading Gigolo
Stars: John Turturro, Woody Allen
Plot: An aging florist decides to become a gigolo and is pimped out by his neighbor.
Thoughts: Ugh. This movie is dreadful. First of all, if you are blessed enough to have Woody Allen appear in your movie (he hasn't appeared in a movie that he hasn't written/directed in decades), then you should probably give him the script and let him do a once over on the whole thing. The script is absolutely terrible, with characters acting certain ways with no purpose whatsoever. Nothing anyone does in this movie makes any sense whatsoever. It's terrible. Stay away.
Grade: D

Mini Reviews (I'm Back)

In case anyone actually reads this, I apologize for my recent absence but things have been sort of crazy at work. Right now, I am going to write a few mini reviews to get caught up on the things I've seen recently (two movies in theaters you might want to check out and two on DVD that you will probably want to avoid), but then I am going to get back to updating this blog more frequently. I also have a few ideas for new funs things to do (i.e. a weekly Friday Top Five list related to new releases or actor birthdays and maybe a Best Director tournament!). But for now, here are quick thoughts on four 2013 releases (from best to worst):

The Internship
Starring: Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, Rose Byrne, Max Minghella
Plot: Two salesmen lose their jobs and decide that despite any skill whatsoever that they are going to get a job at Google. The movie follows a summer long internship program.
Thoughts: Despite being way too long and following all the rules of romantic comedy, The Internship manages to be cute, sweet and funny. The best part about it is, of course, Vaughn and Wilson and their perfect chemistry that also worked so well in Wedding Crashers. But the real star of the show is the Google campus which is fascinating and interesting in every sense of the word.
Grade: B-

Now You See Me
Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Mark Ruffalo, Isla Fisher, Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, Dave Franco, Melanie Laurent
Plot: Four street magicians come together thanks to a mysterious but powerful benefactor to become the most successful magicians with a traveling show where they manage to do completely unbelievable tricks (such as stealing money from a Paris bank while in Vegas). The FBI is hot on their tail though.
Thoughts: Now You See Me benefits from having an almost unrelentless pace, which absolutely works in its favor because if you were given time to stop and think about the whole thing, you would realize how none of it (especially the far fetched, ridiculous ending) makes sense. Still, as far as fun, thoughtless entertainment goes, this is decent.
Grade: C+

Dark Skies
Starring: Keri Russell, J.K. Simmons
Plot: Aliens target a family and slowly drive them crazy.
Thoughts: Cliche, but also really terrible. Simmons is the only - THE ONLY - good thing about it and he's only in it for about 3 minutes.
Grade: D+

Stand Up Guys
Starring: Al Pacino, Christopher Walken, Alan Arkin
Plot: Val (Pacino) is newly released from prison but some powerful people are holding a 28 year grudge and send his bestie (Walken) to give him the night of his life and then kill him.
Thoughts: Remember when Pacino was one of the greatest actors of all time? That whole thing is pretty foggy to me. The more he makes crap like this, the easier it is to forget he was ever even in The Godfather. The end of this movie is actually pretty bad ass, but it's a shame you have to sit through an hour and a half of crap to get to 45 seconds of coolness. On the plus side? It's not as bad as Lords of Salem!
Grade: D-

Bridesmaids

Don't be fooled - Bridesmaids is not a chick flick. And it's not a female version of The Hangover. It's just a damn good, well-written movie that happens to be hilarious. Yes, it does set the bar for R-rated comedies this year. Yes, it's the funniest thing I've seen in theaters since, probably (and ironically), The Hangover. Yes, it's the best movie of 2011 (so far). Yes, my outpouring of overwhelming love for this movie may be because of two things: 1. It's refreshing as hell to have a movie that realistically portrays female friendships, and 2. I may have more things in common with Kristin Wiig's character than I care to admit right now.

So, anyway, Wiig (who also co-wrote the script) plays Annie. Annie once owned a bakery in Milwaukee but the store went under and now she works at a jewelry store although she hates it. She's single, although she's sleeping with a not-so-nice guy (played by Jon Hamm). She's also taken aback when her best friend since childhood Lillian (Maya Rudolph) suddenly gets engaged. Lillian seems to have it all - she's successful and in love. To Annie, it seems her life is a disaster compared to her best friends. Lillian asks Annie to be her maid of honor and, thus, she is thrown into a world with a lot of hilarious women. There is Rita (Wendi McLendon-Covey), Lillian's cousin who is married with three kids and disgusted by all of it. There is Becca (Ellie Kemper) who is a giggly, adorable newlywed who loves Pixar and has only slept with her husband. There's Megan (SCENE STEALER EXTRAORDINAIRE Melissa Mccarthy) who is... well, you have just got to experience her. And there's Helen (Rose Byrne). Annie may be Lillian's oldest and best friend, but Helen is Lillian's new best friend. She's gorgeous. She's rich. And she goes out of her way to make sure Lillian has the most extravagant of everything. Of course, Annie is a little bit jealous.

So, the movie follows these magnificent, well written, completely fleshed out characters over the course of a few weeks (or months). It follows these women through hilarious ups and downs: the well-intentioned but ultimately ill-fated pre-fitting meal at a Brazilian restaurant, the Parisian themed bridal shower, and the hilarious bacherlorette trip to Vegas (which, I'm saying this right now - you will not see anything funnier this year than the scene on the plane. No joke. It is the single funniest thing I have seen in a movie in I don't know how long). You recognize these women, maybe as yourself or maybe as your best friend or a co-worker or a family member. Maybe instead of referring to ourselves as "Carrie's" and "Charlotte's", we can now start referring to ourselves as "Megan's" and "Helen's." (I've got dibs on Annie!). You become friends with these women over the course of this movie, which is what draws you into it. But, also, of course, it's funny as hell.

From director Paul Feig ("Freaks and Geeks") and super-producer Judd Apatow, this movie is both heartfelt and hilarious. The performances are all top notch, with Wiig carrying this film with her humor and likability. Even when her life is falling apart and she's making bad decisions, you still cheer for her, because, well, she's you or someone you know. Rudolph is great as Lillian and Byrne is fantastic as the bitch with a heart of gold Helen. As is Chris O'Dawd in the lone male role (Annie's adorable cop paramour). However, it's Melissa McCarthy that steals the show. Everyone will be taking about her ballsy, take-no-prisoners amazing performance. You probably know her as Sookie on Gilmore Girls, but she'll make you forget all about that here. She's fantastic and hopefully she will get tons more movie roles to prove it in the future.

So, Bridesmaids is a hilarious and well-written movie. And while girls will appreciate the female friendship dynamic of the movie and relate to the relationships, this movie is so funny that it will certainly appeal to both sexes. Not only does it have the best movie poster of the year, so far, but it is also the best movie of the year, so far.

Grade: B+

Insidious

At first, I had little to no interest in seeing this film. The fact that it was written and directed by the people responsible for most of the Saw franchise, and produced by the guy responsible for Paranormal Activity was certainly NOT a selling point for me. In fact, it was a total turn off. As you may know, my predilection in horror movies is NOT the supernatural. I have no interest in ghosts and haunted houses and demons and whatever else because, you know what, prove to me that those exist first! No, you know what does exist? Crazy psychopaths with knives who break into your house in the middle of the night and hack you and your family into a million pieces. That shit happens! That shit is scary! Ghosts aren't scary to me in the least. So my interest in Insidious was pretty non-existant. Of course, I would check it out on DVD, probably hate it, whatever. But then I started reading the reviews. Reputable critics giving it grades like "A-" and calling it the scariest movie since Poltergeist. Tons of really great, really strong reviews. So I decided to give in and go see it. All I can say is, thank goodness I had a free movie ticket because I was right and you all were wrong. Insidious is, indeed, insidious.

Insidious stars Patrick Wilson and Rose Byrne as a couple with three children who recently moved into a brand new house in some picturesque suburb somewhere. Soon after they move in, their oldest son falls into a sort of coma that the doctors can't explain. Then "scary" stuff starts to happen and mom Renee (Byrne, although Renee is spelled in the most stupid way possible and I refuse to accept it as an actual spelling for the name) starts to freak out. She hears scary noises and sees scary things. Ooooh! So scary. Anyway, hottie dad Josh (Wilson) believes her craziness and the family leaves their gorgeous suburban house and moves to a different, uglier house. But guess what? The ghosts and goblins and general cliched creepiness follows them. Barbara Hershey shows up for some unknown reason to be wasted in a terrible role and introduces them to some creepy lady (Lin Shaye) who informs them that the house isn't haunted, but their son is. THEN the movie gets really stupid, involving some strange gas mask apparatus and astral-projection and a whole bunch of other really stupid stuff. Blah, blah, blah, twist ending you saw coming a mile away.

I guess it's pretty plain to see that not only did I not like Insidious, but also, in fact, I hated it. There was absolutely nothing I could say about it that was positive except - I liked the opening credits! They were creepy and old school and enjoyable. It was pretty much all down hill from there. The performances by Wilson and Byrne, two actors who I like, were fine, I guess. Too bad they are stuck in a really terrible movie. Any sort of creepiness that builds up in the first half (and I'm saying that as a sort of objective point of view because where other people might find it "creepy" and "scary", I found it boring and dumb) gets completely ruined by a far-flung ridiculous second half. The fact that people genuinely find this movie good and scary makes me realize why there is really no hope for the future of the horror movie genre. I really hope Scream 4, a SLASHER movie about a crazy MAN who wears a mask and kills people for really no reason, is a huge success and ushers in a change. I can't handle all this supernatural crap that people find scary these days. It just doesn't do it for me, man. Anyway, I liked it better when it was called Poltergeist.

Grade: D-