Worst Films 2019

Back from my year long exile to post my best and worst of the year. I'll be updating from now until the end of the year with my best lists, but first let's get the worst of the year out of the way.

05. Dark Phoenix - Arguably the best story line in an X-Men comic, Dark Phoenix should have been the crowning achievement in a dying franchise. Following the catastrophic fall to the dark side for one time hero Jean Grey, and featuring returning series MVP's Michael Fassbender and James McAvoy, the movie version somehow falls terribly short. Newcomer Jessica Chastain does her best to elevate this mess, but ultimately the movie suffers from a convoluted plot line, messy action sequences, and a number of actors phoning it in (not mentioning any names **cough cough** Jennifer Lawrence). But the biggest mistake of all comes with the casting of young Jean Grey. I've only seen Sophie Turner on Game of Thrones and was holding out criticism of her acting (because Game of Thrones isn't really known for it's writing or acting), but it's possible she may be the least interesting, more boring actor alive. Someone with a little more intensity, or star power, could have helped make this movie at least watchable. Turner isn't that actor.

04. Serenity - SPOILER ALERT - See if you can keep up with me and this plot overview - Matthew McConaughey is a fisherman obsessed with capturing a large tuna. His ex-wife (a completely over the top Anne Hathaway) returns to entice him into killing her abusive new husband (Jason Clarke, who I somehow love even in this mess, even as a terrible person). Also, a creepy Kendall Roy is following him around and walking into the ocean in his suit. And Diane Lane is there, being needy and seductive. The big twist?? This is all a video game being played by an abused little boy. I know, I know. It's all as bizarre and ridiculous as it sounds.

03. Isn't it Romantic - No, no, it is not.

02. Cold Pursuit - Remember when Liam Neeson starred as a bad ass with a particular skill set who traversed the globe to avenge the kidnapping of his daughter? It was a high octane, thrilling, action movie that revitalized his career and was carried along by his movie star charisma and a relatively simple, but appealing plot. Well, this is about a snow plow driver who has to avenge the death of his junkie son and it lacks any of the charm, likability or thrills of the eerily similar Taken. Skip this. Watch Taken again.

01. Under the Silver Lake - This movie contains the following: a dog murderer, a pop band called Jesus and the Brides of Dracula, an underground comic book artist, characters called the "Owl Woman" and the "Homeless King", wealthy men faking their death and "ascending" to live in bunkers with three wives, and a talking squirrel. If any of this sounds appealing to you, then be my guest. I thought it was going to be pleasantly weird and wonderful as well. Turns out, it's just a mess.

So far in 2015...

I have been slacking big time when it comes to blogging, and, honestly, I'm not really feeling it lately. Still, I am going to at least try to post at the end of the month so I can at least keep up to date in case the urge to return to blogging hits me. Here is a brief review of what I've seen this year so far.

Ex Machina
Stars: Domhnall Gleeson,  Oscar Isaac (a.k.a. current mega crushes!)
Plot: A genius invites an employee to his isolated estate to run the Turing test on an AI that he's created.
Thoughts: This is the sexy, creepy, smart Sci-fi movie you didn't know you needed in your life. Brilliantly acted and beautifully bizarre, this is a must see and one of the best things I've seen in a while.
Grade: A-

While We're Young
Stars: Ben Stiller, Naomi Watts, Adam Driver, Amanda Seyfried
Plot: A couple feeling ostracized from their friends because they don't have kids begin hanging out with a pair of 25 year olds.
Thoughts: I love director Noah Baumbach's movies but this disappointed me big time. It felt like a bad Woody Allen and was more pretentious and condescending than funny or enjoyable.
Grade: D+

It Follows
Stars: Miaka Monroe
Plot: A girl is followed by a demon (??) after being passed a sexuality transmitted curse.
Thoughts: *Sigh* Remind me to stop getting caught up in the fuss when Twitter decides something is the best horror movie in decades. It wasn't true of The Babadook (although that is better than this) and it's not true of It Follows. It's got great music, great atmosphere and a killer opening sequence, but a lot of it is cliche and full of plot holes and even sometimes laughably bad.
Grade: C+

Song One
Stars: Anne Hathaway
Plot: After her brother is hit by a car and put into a coma, a woman visits his favorite NYC spots and falls for his favorite musician.
Thoughts: Hathaway,  who usually annoys me, is pretty great, and parts of it are really cute, but it's mostly forgettable. Netflix Begin Again instead.
Grade: C

Black Sea
Stars: Jude Law, Ben Mendelsohn
Plot: A group of out of work submarine workers get hired to go in search of a missing Nazi sub filled with gold.
Thoughts: This movie got dumped in January for some reason, and barely anyone has heard of it, but it's totally worth checking out. It's a pretty solid thriller and a generally good way to spend 2 hours.
Grade: B

Interstellar

Interstellar is a lot like Game of Thrones in so much as I almost never know what the hell is going on, but damn if I don't enjoy it for the most part.

Interstellar takes place in dust bowl America. We are slowly running out of food, so a group of scientists travel into space to find a habitable planet for us to move to. That is the most basic plot of the film, and I'm not really going to get into a whole lot more because wormholes and relativity and science!  Here is the thing about Interstellar - it's two-thirds of a damn good Sci fi movie. Even if you can't always understand what is happening, you can just give in and have fun with a movie like this. My major problem with Interstellar is the last act. The absolute bizarre nature of the third act us just off putting. I know I've seen this a month later than everyone else, but I still don't want to give away any spoilers.  Let's just say my major problem is the fifth dimension book shelf. It just takes away from the awesome Sci fi movie you just spent nearly three hours watching.

If the final act of the script sort of falls apart right before your eyes, the rest of the movie more than makes up for it. The visual effects are absolutely dazzling and breath taking. Christopher Nolan directs the hell out of this movie. He wears his inspiration on his sleeve, and you can see he's trying to make his own 2001: A Space Odyssey. I mean, if you are going to pay homage to space movies, might as well try to take after the best. It never gets there, of course, but it is striking and beautifully shot. It is epic, but also works as a beautiful parable about the love between fathers and daughters.  The score of the movie is stunning as well, but I actually really enjoyed the absence of music, those few moments which were filled with profound silence.

The performances, of course, are top notch. Matthew McConaughey plays Cooper, an engineer and farmer who leaves his children on Earth to travel to space to help save them. He continues the upswing of his career, in which he proves he has so much more talent than anyone could have imagined during his rom-com days. Anne Hathaway plays the appropriately named Amelia, a NASA scientist. I am not a fan of hers so the nicest thing I can say is that she didn't annoy me too much! John Lithgow and Michael Caine are solid in supporting roles. (Side note: Am I allowed to talk about the big surprise cameo yet?? I guess not, but the actor who plays Dr. Mann was a nice surprise and also absolutely wonderful in his small role.) For me, the MVP's are the actors who play Cooper's grown children. Because of relativity and black holes and whatever, Cooper doesn't age in space, but his children do on Earth. Jessica Chastain and Casey Affleck are great in these roles. Affleck continues to be an under appreciated actor. He brings a silent rage to his role, while Chastain is just mesmerizing to watch, as always. She is angry and brilliant and lovely and layered and just a joy to watch. She is one of the most exciting actresses we have and it is always a pleasure to watch her, even in a flawed movie.

Because Interstellar is flawed. It is epic and stunning and enjoyable. It is also complicated and murky and ridiculous. If Interstellar had a better third act, it could have been one of the all time greats.  Instead, it's merely a visual effects driven enjoyable movie.

Grade: B

Les Miserables

I know that I'm not the best writer in the world. I wish I had more time to spend on writing reviews on here. Basically, I get 15 minute breaks at work and that's all the time I get. But I like writing and movies and so this blog is totally for me. If a few people stumble upon my reviwes, then that's fine too. Sometimes, when I write a review about a really great movie, I wish I was a better writer so I could properly convey certain things about the brilliance of said movie. But, I wish this was even more true when I want to write a review of a movie I hated. Because I wish I had the time, energy and talent to let everyone know why I hated Les Miserables so damn much.

I've never seen the stage musical of Les Mis, but I am a fan of musicals in general. In fact, besides horror movies, there probably isn't a genre of film I love more, guilty pleasures and all. I will make excuses for badly done horror movies and musicals more than any other type of film. Rock of Ages came out earlier this year, a musical that was average, at best. But no matter how bad that movie was, it is, at the very least, infinitely more fun than the borefest that is Les Mis. Maybe it has something to do with director Tom Hooper. This is two films I've seen him direct now, and both I absolutely hated while the rest of the world praised them to no ends. The first was 2010's Oscar winning The King's Speech which I found just as dreadful as this, and which took the Best Picture Oscar away from the greatest film of the last decade - The Social Network. I really did try to like Les Mis, which is basically the story of a bunch of poverty stricken prostitutes and slaves, trying to better themselves through a lot of songs. Like, A LOT of songs. Boring song after boring song after boring song. AND THEY ALL SOUND THE SAME!!! Eventually, we get to the real story, about the beginning of the French Revolution and the plot keeps fast forwarding years at a time so we can meet new characters and THEY could sing boring songs that sound like the boring songs the other characters just sang. And all of this is done with the use of incredibly annoying, disconcerting extreme close ups that literally made me want to scream at the top of my lungs.

And while I want to give this movie an F so, so badly, I can't do it. I can't do it because there are two, and exactly two good things about Les Mis. There are two good performances, and these two women get to sing the only two good songs in the entire play of seemingly 60 some songs (THAT ALL SOUND THE SAME) and then they die. The first is Anne Hathaway. She plays factory worker / single mom turned down on her luck prostitute Fantine. Fantine is about twenty mintues into the movie and only sticks around for about twenty minutes which is just enough time to cry and grovel and nail I Dreamed a Dream and then die, leaving the audience wanting more. (Although, she does show up as some sort of angel / ghost near the end which sort of ruins her performance for me, almost, although it's not her fault. I imagine it was the filmmakers way of saying, 'Hey, remember she was in this movie for 10 minutes what seems like 6 hours ago. Remember how good she was so give her an Oscar.') I'm not sure she is going to win the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress but if Jennifer Hudson can win it essentially for killing it singing And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going, then Hathaway has a shot. After Fantine's death, we have to suffer through a lot more crap - terrible singing from Russell Crowe, swoony doe eyes from Amanda Seyfried, Helena Bonham Cater and her newest weirdo character (SIDE NOTE: If she ever wants to impress me again the way she impressed me in Fight Club, she's going to need to play some boring suburban housewife who drives an SUV and wears Cardigans and walks her dog and shops at Target), and Aaron Tveit who is too talented to be stuck playing "Guy in Red Jacket" and really should have played Marius, and Eddie Redmayne's bizarre handsomeness, etc. etc. Then finally we come to the second great performance, one I think I even prefered over Hathaway. Samantha Barks plays Eponine, a young girl who loves a boy who loves someone else, and she is fantastic as the girl who is a friend, sure, but maybe unloveable to the only boy who matters. She sings the single best song in the movie - On My Own and nails it, walking in the rain, whispering "I love him." She's perfection. And then she dies too and we are stuck with more boring songs (THAT ALL SOUND THE SAME) and more annoying close ups and more opulence that, I guess, is supposed to make us think the movie is epic when really it's just all too much.

There might be a good movie in here somewhere, but Les Mis needs a better director, and a better editor in order to find it. Mostly I just found the entire thing dreadful. And the worst thing about the whole thing is that after it was over, people in the theater STOOD UP AND CLAPPED! I had been imagining ways to fake a seizure or something in order to get the hell out of there, and people were giving it a standing ovation! It completely blew my mind, which is possibly why I've been so angry about this movie for the last few days.

I told myself I was going to be a less snarky, nicer person starting in 2013, but I guess I'm not off to a good start.

Grade: D

Screen Actors Guild Awards - Nominees and Thoughts

Critics groups have been announcing their nominees and winners for weeks now, but today marks the real start of award season as the Screen Actors Guild Awards announced their nominations. I'm told that Zero Dark Thirty and Django Unchained did not get their screeners out in time so that may be why there isn't a lot of love for them (disappointingly). Anyway, here are the movie nominees along with my thoughts on the whole things.

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Leading Role
Bradley Cooper - Silver Linings Playbook
Daniel Day-Lewis - Lincoln
John Hawkes - The Sessions
Hugh Jackman - Les Miserables
Denzel Washington - Flight
Thoughts - Right off the bat, the big omission is no Joaquin Phoenix for The Master, a performance that some thought early off would be an Oscar winning sure thing. While I liked his performance a whole lot, I prefered the other performances from that film so maybe his weirdo ticky warts and all performance was more divisive than people first thought.

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Leading Role
Jessica Chastain - Zero Dark Thirty
Marion Cotillard - Rust and Bone
Jennifer Lawrence - Silver Linings Playbook
Helen Mirren - Hitchcock
Naomi Watts - The Impossible
Thoughts - I've seen NONE of these movies. I would like to see at least 4 of them (well, really, all of them) but unfortunately I live in the sticks so it's going to take a while. Based on my eagerness for Zero Dark Thirty, however, I'm rooting for Jessica!

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Supporting Role
Alan Arkin - Argo
Javier Bardem - Skyfall
Robert DeNiro - Silver Linings Playbook
Philip Seymour Hoffman - The Master
Tommy Lee Jones - Lincoln
Thoughts - Kinda shocked and surprised to see Bardem for Skyfall. I thought he was great in the movie but not award worthy great. Sort of like Anne Hathaway in The Dark Knight Rises. The two male performances I'm most eager about this year failed to make the cut too - Jason Clarke in Zero Dark Thirty and Leonardo DiCaprio in Django Unchained. Hopefully, it was just because a lot of people didn't get their screeners and these two can still gain some Oscar traction.

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Supporting Role
Sally Field - Lincoln
Anne Hathaway - Les Miserables
Helen Hunt - The Sessions
Nicole Kidman - The Paperboy
Maggie Smith - The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
Thoughts - Shocked by the inclusion of Kidman. I guess all these awards nominations and critics groups are really trying to make me sit through The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, huh? Fine, I'll do it!

Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion Picture
Argo
The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
Les Miserables
Lincoln
Silver Linings Playbook
Thoughts - Les Mis and Silver Linings have the star studded casts, Marigold has the respected older actors, but literally every working character actor in Hollywood was either in Argo or Lincoln, so I'm pulling for one of those two.

Outstanding Action Performance by a Stunt Ensemble in a Motion Picture
The Amazing Spider-Man
The Bourne Legacy
The Dark Knight Rises
Les Miserables
Skyfall
Thoughts - Anyone this awards season who includes The Dark Knight Rises in anything at all is okay in my book.

Catching Up on Summer Movies

So, I sort of temporarily abandoned blogger but it was only because, for some reason, it wasn't allowing me to update. It looks like that might be fixed now so I have returned. In my absence, I was trying to keep up with things over on tumblr. If you want to read my recent full reviews go here: http://thiscinephile.tumblr.com/. For now, however, I will just post little quickies to get up to date.

Rock of Ages - Very similar to Burlesque but without the awesome performances courtesy of Cher and Stanley Tucci. The story of a young girl who tries to make it in Hollywood in the 80s, Rock of Ages was a huge success on Broadway. Julianne Hough has potential. She can dance and sing and act (her level of talent goes in that order too) but lacks any sort of chemistry with Diego Boneta, who also has absolutely no charisma whatsoever. Catherine Zeta-Jones is a titan of the musical world (Chicago) and takes a one-dimensional, slightly annoying role and proves why she is a superstar. Russell Brand and Alec Baldwain are forgettable at best. Paul Giamatti manages to give a great performance in the role of an unlikeable jackass. Then there is Tom Cruise. If you are going to see Rock of Ages, go see it for Tom Cruise. I'm not his biggest fan. But as Axl Rose clone Stacee Jaxx, Cruise, who makes his entrance in assless chaps, is all in. His dedication to this character is ridiculous and he parades around this movie like a peacock, so showy and vain and just damn good. The music in the movie is super fun (and there's a lot of it), but ultimately it's just a Tom Cruise vehicle. Somehow, this movie just didn't jive for me. Something was lacking and missing. Grade: C+

Magic Mike - Under the direction of Steven Soderbergh, Magic Mike becomes so much more than a movie about male strippers. The dialogue is rich and flows realistically. It's also genuinely funny and has a lot of heart. The filmmaking is just great and I especially loved the way the film seemed so vivid at night, but was sort of muted and washed out during the day, looking how you feel with a hangover. The performances are great, as well. Channing Tatum, this is story is based on his life, is clearly the best dancer and is so charming and charasmatic that he just keeps begging his haters to find faults with his seriously improved acting. Cody Horn is a great find and has great chemistry with both Tatum and Alex Pettyfer. Saepking of Pettyfer, this is his finest performance to date (especially during his second half unraveling) and proves he is much more than a pretty face. Then there is McConaughey, so dirty and grimy and slimy and hilarious as the perverse father figure of this group of lost boys. All in all, I loved Magic Mike. Soderbergh and this talented cast created a film that is downright good. Grade: B+

Ted - It seemed everyone in the audience with me loved this movie. I did not. Ted wasn't completely without laughs but mostly I found it boarish and just plain boring. I don't feel like rehasing a negative review so head over to Tumblr to read the whole thing if you want. Grade: D-

The Amazing Spider-Man - The film wastes a lot of time with the first act that doesn't necessarily go anywhere. The movie isn't really all that long (compared to other summer comic book movies) but it sure as hell feels like it. The best thing about this movie is Andrew Garfield as Peter Parker. He just completely nails it and you almost don't want the original trilogy to exist because this movie will always be compared to those movies and Garfield doesn't deserve that. He is extraordinary. The Amazing Spider-man is at its best when it's this cute indie love story inside this epic film. When it's at its best, I'm so glad they decided to reboot it. The 3D aspect of the film also ratchets up the fun quotient. I'm not a big fan of 3D but if there was ever a superhero who begged to be in 3D, then it's Spider-man! The other downside is that I felt cheated out of a villain. Horror movies are only as good as their villains and it takes the Lizard nearly two thirds of the movie to arrive, and then he's more misunderstood then villainous. Emma Stone is sassy and witty and adorable as Gwen Stacy. The Amazing Spider-man is, indeed, amazing. It's ultimately a fun, exciting and sweet summer movie. Grade: B

Savages - Savages was a strange kind of movie for me. It's a really well done film, both dark and gritty and kind of funny. There's sex, drugs, violence and it has an actual plot, which is pretty for a summer movie. Plus, the cast is universally pretty great. Still, I was expecting more. Aaron Johnson and Taylor Kitsch are pot growers who are in love with the same woman (Blake Lively) and get involved with a Mexican drug cartel headed by Salma Hayek and her sociopathic goon Benicio Del Toro. The plot and script is mostly great, engaging, interesting, thrilling and intense. Some of the dialogue, however, is a bit cheesy / corny / dumb (mostly Lively's voice overs). The cinematagraphy is great as well. The major problem for me was the terrible / preposterous / ridiculous / stupid ending. Seriously, there had to be a better ending out there somewhere!! Hayek, Del Toro and John Travolta are all hammy great. Johnson is sensitive and endearing. Lively is the weak spot, of course. But Kitsch finally put his summer blunders behind him. This the kind of intense, dark, gritty work the actor should be doing, not fluff like Battleship. Grade: B-


The Dark Knight Rises - The best movie of the year, so far, for sure. It might not be as good as The Dark Knight but it's pretty damn close. There are flaws in the movie, sure, but sometimes you just have to look at the bigger picture and appreciate a movie for being so epic and entertaining. And all the good stuff, no BRILLIANT stuff, more than makes up for any nitpicky flaws you might find with the movie. My review over on Tumblr is longer and more detailed but the gist is this: Christopher Nolan has crafted a trilogy that will stand that test of tie and be revered as, probably and hopefully, the greatest superhero trilogy of all time. The Dark Knight Rises is the perfect ending to that trilogy. Grade: A-

Love and Other Drugs

There are exactly two really good things about Love and Other Drugs. 1) Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway have fantastic chemistry, which, really, is the most important part of a romantic comedy. 2) The performances by the lead actors are stellar. Other than that, the movie was mostly one cliche after another and nowhere near as original or mature as it thinks it is.
Gyllenhaal stars as Jamie Randall, a helluva salesman who gets fired from his job at a Radio Shack rip-off after sleeping with his boss' girlfriend. Since he comes from a family of over achievers and doctors, he decides to go into pharmaceutical sales while sleeping with every available woman in the Ohio River Valley. While shadowing a doctor (Hank Azaria), Jamie meets Maggie Murdoch (Hathaway), a free-spirited 26 year old with early onset Parkinson's (eventhough they say this very clearly in the first twenty minutes or so of the movie, the older woman sitting behind me just didn't seem to get it. About halfway through, she very loudly exclaimed, "That girl must be sick!"). Maggie wants nothing to do with Jamie and, since he has never been rejected by a girl before, that makes her quite alluring. Soon, as in every single romantic comedy, he turns her no's into yes' and the two begin having a pretty heated sexual relationship (advisory - there is a LOT of nudity in this film, although it is all pretty tastefully done). Maggie tells him not to fall in love with her. He says he won't. Of course, he does. Things go awry. Blah, blah.
The movie is neither romantic or very comedic. I mean, I guess there are a few funny parts here and there but I would hardly say it was a comedy in any way, shape or form. And romantic? Not so much. They pretty much just have sex a lot and then suddenly are in love with each other. I know she is sick but she is also kind of awful at some points and it seems he might be with her just to prove a point. Like, yes, he can be an adult and have responsibilities. I don't know. They have amazing chemistry which is such a good thing but I'm not sure the script properly supported them.
The movie is also full of rom-com cliches. There is not a single lick of originality anywhere in the film. There is the artistic cute girl who lives in a terrible but artsy loft. There is the annoying but supposedly funny roommate. There is the loveable co-worker. There is the sweet, sweet montage where their love grows as they do simple day to day activities. There is the drama filled montage set to some sappy song as their relationship slowly falls apart. There is a crisis in the third act which results in a change of heart. There is a public display of a declaration of love. And the whole "I'm a cad but love is going to change me and make me a better person" thing was done so much better a million times over (Jerry Maguire, anyone? ... By the way, this movie rips off Jerry Maguire at least a dozen times).
Anyway, this movie could have been something good. Like I said, the chemistry between the leads, and their performances, save this movie from being pure crap. If only they had a good script to help them out. Instead, they are stuck in an average Hollywood cliche.
Grade: C+

Mini Reviews

Bride Wars - Cutesy and completely cliched in every single way, the only thing that maybe makes Bride Wars a tiny bit watchable is that Kate Hudson is charming. That's not to say I've forgiven her for throwing away her entire career (after all, she hasn't made a good movie since Almost Famous, really). Still, she is a charming actress and I guess if she's going to do romantic comedies, then that's something I have to accept. Still, at least she could pick GOOD romantic comedies. They are rare but they do exist. For someone who loves Anne Hathaway so very much in Rachel Getting Married, this movie just proves why I dislike her in everything else. I will admit, however, that I thoroughly enjoyed the fact that these two ladies settled a despute by having a dance off. In my world, we would settle everything with a dance off.
Grade: D

My Bloody Valentine - First of all, I live in Pennsylvania (where this movie takes place). It is currently February and nearly 60 degrees. But guess what!?! Even if there is a mini heat wave in Pennsylvania in February - there would still be traces of snow SOMEWHERE! Enough about that. This movie is pretty terrible. There were times when I thought to myself, "This movie is sort of a throwback to 80s horror movies - it could quite possibly be fun and bad in a really fun way." But no. It's just bad in a bad way. It seems the only person who was in on the joke (that this was a terrible movie) was Kerr Smith who I thought did a fine job (for what it's worth). Except, maybe he's just a terrible actor in a terrible movie. I don't know. Anyway, this movie is terrible. It's a good thing Jensen Ackles is cute because he's a terrible actor.
Grade: D-

Taken - Another cliched film - this time a story of revenge. Liam Neeson is amazing in every way... it's a shame this movie is so silly. The dialogue is just laughable. The action sequences are a bit overdone. It's just all around cheesy although I guess it has it's moments of decency. And it's scary to say, but it's the best movie I've seen so far in 2009.
Grade: D+

The Reader - Yes, Kate Winslet is incredible. Yes, Stephen Daldry's directing is incredible. But as far as Best Picture goes? I'm not so sure. It's one of the better films among the nominees but it still wouldn't make my top ten list. It's an interesting and fascinating film. It tells a great story and it has amazing acting and directing and writing. Still, it just doesn't all work for me. I still prefer Winslet in Revolutionary Road. The Reader is a good movie, for sure. I would recommend it, of course, but there are parts that drag out. And for as much as I love Ralph Fiennes, his parts of the movie were borderline boring.
Grade: B


Coming soon... a review of the Friday the 13th remake (I shudder to think) and final Oscar predictions!

Top Ten List - Best Actress 2008

Honorable Mention - Johanna Day in August: Osage County - Not a film performance, but a riveting, intensely controlled (and some time delightfully out of control) stage performance. If August was a movie (which apparently it's going to be) and Day was in it (which hopefully she will be), she would be at the top of this list, for sure. She's in charge now, for sure.

10. Angelina Jolie in Changeling - We all know I'm not the biggest Angelina fan. Still, you can't deny talent and her performance, although often one note, is still extremely powerful at times. That one specific scene (you know, the one in all the previews, "I want MY son back") is even more intense once you see the context of it - she's yelling this at a 10 year old boy.

09. Cate Blanchett in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - Cate has never looked more beautiful. And I am in the corner with people who think Cate can do no wrong. It's true here, as she makes a very flawed, very narcisstic and stubborn character so loveable. Benjamin Button falls in love with her and so do we.

08. Keira Knightley in The Duchess - Although the movie itself is highly flawed, the performances are nearly flawless. Ralph Fiennes just missed my Best Supporting Actor list for his skeevy Duke (and for his hilarious turn in the wonderful In Bruges), but Kiera makes the list for her witty, charming role as the lonely Duchess - forced to choose between love and her family.

07. Summer Bishil in Towelhead - An extremely interesting and well done performance for someone so young! She's truly impressive as a young actress dealing with very, very heavy subject matter. She pulls it off with grace, innocence and beauty.

06. Rebecca Hall in Vicky Cristina Barcelona - Cruz may be getting all the buzz (and she is more than deserving) but Hall is spectacularly funny as well. She plays a cynical spitfire, about to marry a man she doesn't necessarily love while discovering her sexuality with a sexy artist.

05. Naomi Watts in Funny Games - Throughout the entire second half of the film, Watts is in a constant state of duress. Crying, screaming, desperately clinging to some kind of hope while nearly giving up on everything. Her performance is intensely moving.

04. Kate Winslet in Revolutionary Road - Winslet's April is a dreamer, for sure. She dreams of a better life with her husband but she's surely not a happy character. There's all those intense screaming matches with DiCaprio. Then there's sexy love scenes. And, of course, my very favorite scene. DiCaprio has just confessed that he's cheated on her. She is very unemotional about the whole thing. He's screaming at her, asking her why, to which she responds, very quietly, very calmly with a slight smile, "Fuck who'd you like, dear." Perfect line reading.

03. Anne Hathaway in Rachel Getting Married - Maybe the most revelatory performance of the year. I never liked Anne Hathaway, sure. I also never necessarily thought she was a good actress. But her performance as Kym here is so alive and so unlike anything she's ever done. It's impressive and welcomed.

02. Meryl Streep in Doubt - Doubt may be about the wonderful script and the great source material. Sure, there's Hoffman and Adams and Davis, but make no mistake - this is all about Meryl. As it should be. Her stubborn, hard headed, wickedly funny take on the nun is perfection.

01. Michelle Williams in Wendy and Lucy - Wendy and Lucy is a movie where not much happens. It's a movie without a lot of dialogue. It's a movie where, for much of the movie, Williams' Wendy is walking around a small unknown town searching for her dog. With very little to work with, Williams has given her best performance to date. Her quietly effective work will break your heart. There's been little as moving this year as the final ten minutes in this movie - and that's thanks to Michelle!

Mini DVD Reviews

Paranoid Park - It's no secret that I think Gus Van Sant is brilliant. A genius, even. He is most definitely ever present on a list of my top ten directors of all time (perhaps I shall make that list sometime...). And while I like to pretend that the ill-conceived Psycho remake never really happened, I have come to terms with the all around mediocre lameness of Finding Forester. After all, he's better than those two bit boring films. And Paranoid Park is the next film to prove it. With it's minimilistic cineamatography, non-linear story telling and mostly non-professional cast, Parnoid Park is another gem from Van Sant. It's exceedingly well done with an interesting story (did a high school skateboarder accidentally kill a security guard?) and great acting from lots of unknowns. Van Sant has not disappointed me in a very, very long time.
Grade: B+

Return to Sleepaway Camp - Having long been a believer that Sleepaway Camp is one of, if not, THE best horror films, perhaps my expectations were too high for the long, long, LONG awaited sequel. And since the original Sleepaway Camp has possibly the best twist ending ever, the sequel can't possibly top it, right? Well, unfortunately, it is right. While Return to Sleepaway Camp has the same cast (Felicia Rose and more!) and the same director, it also, unfortunately, has the same story line. There is little difference between the original and the sequel... except for, you know, twenty years or so. You can see the big twist ending coming a mile away and the main character is probably the most annoying horror movie character since Franklin in The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Still, it's not a total bust. The death scenes are all original and cool as hell, my friend Nick has a scene stealing cameo and, well, it's just great to have the original cast back together. It's not a great film by any means but it's a fun way to spend an hour and a half.
Grade: C

Get Smart - The best parts are pretty much everything you see in the trailers. There's nothing really to expand on here. Bill Murray's cameo in a tree is brilliant. Other than that, I wasn't shocked by anything: Alan Arkin is a hilarious scene stealing genius, Steve Carrell is adorably dorky, Anne Hathaway is a terrible actress and The Rock has a certain amount of charm that makes up for his lack of talent. It's not a bad movie by any means... it's just not good either.
Grade: C

Transiberian - Now let's talk about the hidden film gem of 2008. I never even heard of this movie. Usually, I at least hear of most films. If I haven't heard of something, then I think it's probably a bad sign. But the cast of this film was enough to make me change my mind and give it a try. After all, it's got Ben Kingsley, Woody Harrelson, Kate Mara and, of course, Emily Mortimer who is so good and so fantastic in this film. The film follows a young couple (Mortimer and Harrelson) who get entangled in a drug trafficking plot while traveling on a train through Russia. Kingsley plays a drug agent who is on to their incidental involvement. Of course, there's so much more to the story but I wouldn't want to spoil anything. Plus, there's so much story it would take forever to explain. Basically, let me say this - Transiberian is totally worth it. It's completely engulfing, interesting and pleasantly surprising.
Grade: B

Pathology - Next on to a film which is neither engulfing, interesting or pleasant in any way. It follows Milo Ventimiglia from Heroes as a pathology student who gets involved with a little game. He and the rest of the med students begin to kill random people. The others have to figure out how it was done. Interesting concept, I guess, but that's all it really has going for it. The acting is mediocre, at best. The character arcs of certain people are completely unbelievable and bizarre. It lacks any likeable characters to cheer for. It's just a bad film, plain and simple.
Grade: D

Birds of America - Who is the MVP of pretty much every movie he's ever been in? If you answered BEN FOSTER, then you're right. Birds of America is just above terrible. The only saving grace, really, is Foster and his performance as a man so sick of society that he begins eating berries and living by a ravine. Maybe it's that I can completely relate to him because that's what I want to do just about every day of my life or maybe it's just that he's such a fantastic actor (or probably both) but it was enough to keep me interested in an otherwise dull and boring movie.
Grade: D+ (the plus is for Foster, of course)

Coming soon - Bond. James Bond.

Porn, Angelina and a wedding...

Zack and Miri Make a Porno - Well, if you expect Zack and Miri to make a porno that's what you are going to get. Here's the thing: if you like Kevin Smith and his 'humor' then you will probably like this movie. If you don't, then you won't. Kevin Smith is very, very hit or miss for me. I liked Dogma and Chasing Amy and that's about it. Call me pretentious, but I like my comedy without dick and fart jokes (and that's just the tip of the iceberg in this movie). Still, it's not all bad. Smith manages to mix the sweetness in with the naughtiness and that actually works for the most part. It doesn't hurt that Seth Rogen (Zack) and Elizabeth Banks (Miri - trying not to look like the goddess bombshell that she is) have great comedic chemistry together. Their love story is actually borderline believable. Everyone knows the plot by now - Zack and Miri can't pay their bills so they decide to make a quick buck the old fashion way - making porn. They enlist help from Craig Robinson (the scenestealer best known as Daryl on The Office), Jason Mewes (Kevin Smith's muse who does full frontal) and a couple of actual porn stars. Then there's Justin Long who all but steals the show in his brief ten minute or so part. For me, Zack and Miri was hit and miss. At times it was very, very funny. At times it was very, very touching. At times it was just silly. And at times it went just a little too far.
Grade: C+

Changeling - About five years ago, Clint Eastwood directed the shit out of a movie called Mystic River. For my money, there were few films better directed than that film. After making something so near perfect (not to mention other great turns with Million Dollar Baby, Flags of Our Fathers and Letters to Iwo Jima), how could Eastwood possibly make a film so... sloppy. Maybe sloppy isn't necessarily the word. The movie starts out like a Lifetime film (not necessarily a bad thing since I've been known to watch a Lifetime movie or two in my day) and eventually turns into a crime procedural. The beginning half works very well. Eastwood makes old school Los Angeles look and feel just right. It doesn't hurt that he's got a top notch performance from Angelina Jolie to work with. As a young mother searching for her son who has gone missing, she's phenominal. There is one particular scene - you've seen it in the trailer when she's yelling "I want MY son back" - that is particularly emotional once you see it in context (SPOILER ALERT - she's actually yelling this at the ten year old boy pretending to be her son). As no real fan of Angelina (I can't think of one thing I actually liked her in...), I'm a big enough person to admit she's stellar and worthy of that Oscar nomination. Still, the second half of the movie falls apart and it's mostly due to some poor editing. Make that very poor editing. There's a particular sequence that jumps between two courtroom scenes that is just jarringly bad. It's almost unthinkable that someone who is as much of a pro as Eastwood would let a sequence in his film. All in all, Changeling isn't necessarily bad... it's just mediocre.
Grade: C

Rachel Getting Married - First off, I love hand held camera work probably more than anything when it's done well. And in Rachel Getting Married, it's done very, very, very well. Jonathan Demme goes for a raw, emotional, intimate feel with his direction and it was a great decision. There's a lot to praise about Rachel Getting Married, starting with the great camera work, continuing on to the smart, clever and emotionally powerful script and finishing with a quartet of stellar performances (from best to even better - Bill Irwin as an overprotective father, Anne Hathaway as an emotionally stunted, volatile young woman recently released from rehab, Debra Winger as a passive/aggressive mother and RoseMarie DeWitt as the titular Rachel, struggling with a sister who constantly steals the spotlight, even on her big wedding day). Still, there's a little bit to dislike as well, starting with a rehearsal dinner that seems like it takes five days (do we really need to see EVERYONE'S toast? we can't just see one or two?), continuing on to a completely waste of space with a dishwasher scene that lasts way too long and finishing with a final act that does little to advance the plot. Nothing really happens in the last ten minutes or so. We spend too much time dancing at a wedding and not enough time dealing with this emotionally stunted dysfuntional family. Still, in the end, Rachel Getting Married is this powerful, viscious, cruel, dangerous film that is also pretty damn good.
Grade: B

Tomorrow - The hidden gem of 2008 and Bill Murray in a tree. Also, I may or may not confess my love for Emily Mortimer.

Superbad, Becoming Jane

Superbad - Superbad is pretty much one of the funniest movies I have ever seen in my entire life. It is definitely the funniest movie of the year. I can't remember when I laughed harder. The plot is quite simple: Three high school friends (the brilliant Michael Cera plays Evan, Jonah Hill plays Seth and Christopher Mintz-Plasse plays McLovin) are on a quest, during one of the last weekends before graduation, to get alcohol and sex. In that order. While the plot is quite simple, naturaly, nothing really works out as planned. I don't want to divulge too much and take away from the wonderfully concocted craziness of the script but let's just say that two slacker cops (SNL's Bill Hader and co-screenwriter and Knocked Up star Seth Rogen) show up to portray the best/worst cops in the history of film. Apparently Rogen and his pal Evan Goldberg wrote the script together when they were actually in high school. You can tell. These kids talk like they are in high school. These kids act like they are in high school. Nothing is watered down at all. And it's wonderful. This movie takes the raunchiness of Knocked Up and The 40 Year Old Virgin and wears the vulgarity proudly. This is bound to become a cult classic. It's the Fast Times at Ridgemont High or Dazed and Confused of the myspace generation. This movie captures the sometimes hellish existence of adolescence perfectly. Hill and Cera have amazing chemistry together. Hill is manic and crazy, rocking a Richard Pryor t-shirt and a Jew fro. He finally gets to showcase just how funny he truly is. His overexuberance plays perfectly off of Cera's pitch perfect awkward, dead pan. He's the well-meaning, respectful nerd. He is the king of the awkward pause and uncomfortable silence. They play best friends the way only two people who have actually hung out together can play best friends. Their chemistry is wonderful. Hader and Rogen are a joy to watch as two outlandish cops. They try to steal the show but the script and performances are just so tight that no one really steals anything. The entire cast works together beautifully. But, it is probably new actor Christopher Mintz-Plasse that you'll remember in twenty years. This is his first acting role EVER! He is the coolest geek since "Terry the Toad" in American Graffiti. Mintz-Plasse plays Fogell - or McLovin which is the name he choses for his fake ID. He's more than memorable as he gets into one crazy situation after another with the crazy cops. If you want to laugh from beginning to end, then you absolutely have to see Superbad. In fact, see it twice since you'll probably be laughing so hard you'll miss some of the funny parts. This movie is definitely bonafide badass.

Grade: A-

Becoming Jane - So, I've tried to write this review three times now and it won't let me so here is the shortened version: Becoming Jane is more or less Pride and Prejudice: Redux. James McAvoy is brilliant, sexy, charming, vibrant, sexy, electrifying, sexy. Maggie Smith and James Cromwell are underused. Anne Hathaway just can't carry a movie by herself. Sorry. Someone explain to me why people keep refering to her as 'pretty'? The script is mediocre. The ending is great. James McAvoy skinny dips which is worth the price of admission alone. The cinematography is solid. The editing could have been better. There is some humor, some good points but the movie is mostly boring. Oh, and if James McAvoy ever says the words "Run away with me" to me. I'm going. Don't expect a note or a letter or a goodbye. I'm going. I don't care if he's poor. Those blue eyes alone are enough to keep me satisfied. This has been your shortened review.
Grade: C-